She created her own website Joyfuldating.cn, named after her English name Joy, and quit her day job to become a dating and relationship coach that specializes in cross-cultural love.Instead of being a contradiction, her tech background comes in handy.Then she helps them get what they want strategically, unleashing their full potential in taking action to find and keep a "quality" partner.Embracing differences In understanding themselves first, their mind can become more open and accepting of other people, explained Yang."Embracing our differences and appreciating them will be especially helpful for intercultural couples," she said.She believes that accepting and embracing these cultural differences and seeing them as special and unique will lead to a feeling of gratitude and appreciation.In contributing to happy and successful intercultural relationships, she hopes to have a greater impact on cooperation, understanding and peace between different nations and cultures."I am proud of what I do," she said.Photo: Katrin Büchenbacher/ GTStill single Occasionally, Yang has male clients too.Franz, who wishes to conceal his Chinese name for privacy reasons, contacted her to receive dating advice.
So, Yang studied computer science and technology, and after graduation, she moved to Beijing where she steadily climbed the ladder of success from being a programmer to a manager."Yang advised him to show genuine interest in the person he likes first."Be yourself and find out what moves her, what she likes, what her dream is," Yang said.For someone who knows so much about love and relationships, she has been taking her time finding "the one" herself.Yang said she is essentially doing the same thing she used to do in her previous job, just on a different subject.Whereas she was fixing bugs in computer code before, now she analyzes the "software" humans run on."People think feelings and emotions are illogical, but actually, it's also about a deeper understanding of human beings. Sometimes we feel terrible because our underlying beliefs, thought patterns and rules regarding what we should or shouldn't do don't correspond with reality.When two lovers from different cultural backgrounds come together, unique challenges emerge.Chinese women tend to impose their own expectations and ideas on their partner, Yang said, drawing from her own experience in past relationships.On the other hand, many of her Chinese clients have reported feeling disrespected when their foreign partner speaks lowly of Chinese products or culture.Other issues are that foreign men tend to avoid talking about money or feel that the Chinese woman's family invades too much into their life as a couple, especially when it comes to raising children."Western men think that their child is theirs, but Chinese families see children as belonging to the whole family," Yang explained.However, after 10 years, she'd had enough."I wasn't a very talented coder," she said."Other people were a lot faster than me."But her English language proficiency proved to be her distinctive advantage when dealing with international clients.